Independence, Short Form
This re-framing of the US Declaration of Independence in modern English is something I posted on FA for July 4, 2016. – Jennie 2019-07-04
Happy Independence Day to everyone in the USA! This is an idea I had. Let’s see if it’s any good.
When a group decides to separate from another group, it’s only right to say why.
We can all agree on a few things, I’m sure:
- That all people are equal and have basic rights, including life, liberty, and trying to be happy.
- That people, by their own consent, create governments and give them powers, to protect their rights.
- That whenever a government starts taking away their rights, the people have the right to replace it with another one that they think will work better.
Of course, it’s unwise to overthrow entire governments willy-nilly, especially if they’ve been stable for a long time, so usually people would rather put up with a few bad things than do the hard work of getting rid of it all and setting up something new. But when a government has been treating its people like dirt for a long time, they have a right and a duty to overthrow it and replace it. These colonies have been suffering just that for quite some time, and we’ve had enough. The King of Great Britain has been taking one step after another toward absolute tyranny over us. We’ll give the rest of the world a list of some things he’s done so they can judge for themselves:
- Our legislatures have to submit laws they pass to the King for approval. They’ve done so, but he’s refused to approve them.
- He’s told the governors of the colonies that they have to suspend certain kinds of laws until the King approves them, and then he neglects them, neither approving nor vetoing them.
- When our people want to start new towns, he’ll only approve them if they can’t elect representatives. By the way, only tyrants do that.
- He’s used a tactic of convening meetings in difficult-to-reach places so people will be too exhausted to complain about whatever he does.
- He’s dissolved our colonial legislatures for doing things he doesn’t like.
- After doing that, he doesn’t let that colony elect a new legislature for a long time, so it’s basically in a state of anarchy, where we’re being attacked from outside while we’re fighting each other, unless we get together to hold an impromptu convention.
- He’s been preventing our growth, blocking laws that would encourage people to come to our colonies and passing laws making it harder for people to obtain land.
- He’s refused to pass laws establishing courts and judges.
- Where there are judges, he alone appoints and pays them, and fires them if they do anything he doesn’t like.
- He’s set up new courts and customs officials not approved by our legislatures, which we’re expected to help while they harass us with their regulations.
- He’s got armies stationed here, even though it’s peacetime and our legislatures say they can’t be here.
- He’s passed laws saying that our colony governments have no power over his armies.
- The British Parliament, which we had no part in electing and which our laws don’t give any power over us, has been passing laws about us, and the King’s done nothing, even though he can veto anything they do.
- He’s forced our people to let his soldiers live in their homes and places of business.
- Whenever his soldiers kill our people, he has mock trials that do nothing to punish them.
- He’s cut off our trade with other parts of the world.
- We have no vote in the British Parliament, but the King’s letting them tax us anyway.
- He’s been depriving us of the right to a jury trial.
- He’s been singling out people, arresting them on false charges, and taking them back to Britain for trial.
- He’s set up a new province with a new made-up set of laws (yes, Quebec, we’re talking about you), enlarged its boundaries, and obviously intends for this terrible thing to become the new model for how he’s going to govern all our colonies.
- He’s taken away our colonies’ authority to act, abolished our best laws, and changed our forms of government.
- He’s suspended our colonies’ legislatures and declared that he was the only one who could pass laws.
- Meanwhile he’s declared us outside his protection and has been waging war against us.
- His forces have been attacking our ships and coasts, burning our towns, and destroying our lives.
- He’s hired armies of foreign mercenaries and is sending them here to kill us right now, finishing the job he started with his cruelty and lies, like some kind of barbarian warlord, rather than the ruler of a civilized country.
- He’s forced prisoners taken captive at sea to fight on his side against their own friends or be killed themselves.
- He’s had his agents incite rebellion in our colonies and persuade the native tribes to attack us from outside.
Whenever he’s done these things, we’ve asked humbly for him to stop. His only answer has been to increase our suffering. A ruler who acts like this is unfit to rule.
We haven’t neglected our British friends. We’ve warned them that Parliament has been overreaching its power. We’ve reminded them why we came here. We’ve pleaded with them to act out of their well-known justice and generosity and put a stop to their government’s actions, which are trying to sever our ties, in the name of our common kinship. But they, too, have not listened. So we have no choice but to consider them enemies for now, as we’re declaring war. When peace comes, we hope to be friends with the British people again.
We are the representatives of the United States of America, acting in the name of the people of our colonies, and we hope God understands, but because of all of these grievances, we declare that we’re free and independent from Great Britain, so we can wage war, make peace, form alliances, engage in commerce, and do everything an independent country can do. We’re relying on God to protect us as we make this declaration, promising to support each other with our lives, property and honor.
As you may know, the year was 1776, the King of England was George III, and he had a lot more power than the British Crown has today. Queen Elizabeth II can’t simply veto anything Parliament passes, for one thing. Anyway, times were different, and we’ve been friends with the British for quite some time now. *hugs to the UK folks*
When I say “God” here, I’m shortening the phrases “the Supreme Judge of the world” and “divine Providence.” There were many different religious beliefs in the American colonies, everything from Quakers to Catholics, and they mostly believed in some form of God, but exactly what form varied a lot. Thomas Paine, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, James Madison, Ethan Allen, and George Washington were all Deists, a non-Christian religious philosophy. But all seemed to agree on “God” to refer to the divine being whom they revered, so I don’t think I’m overstepping the boundaries by shortening the phrases to “God.”
Oh, one other thing. Yes, “all men are created equal” does mean “all people.” There is enough evidence from Jefferson’s other works as well as the sections that were cut out of the Declaration itself to prove that he used “men” to mean “people,” both men and women, of all races, as did many other writers of his time.
